That's it. Everyone freeze. Don't move.
No one may walk anywhere; the floors have been vacuumed/swept/mopped.
The Bug may not wake up from her nap having pooped her pants; every dirty diaper has been taken to the trash.
No one may eat; the dishes are done and counters are wiped.
No one may use the toilet; they have been scrubbed.
Also, no one may wipe; the rolls of toilet paper have been restocked.
Do not plop down on the LoveSac; it has been freshly fluffed.
Unfortunately for the world, I will not brush my teeth; I polished the sinks.
You'll have to remain in your current clothing; the laundry is done. (It's not folded. Shh. Don't tell.)
Dare not stink; the Candle Breeze has been running, filling the air with Citrus Burst.
Do not try me; I am a postpartum woman just minutes away from the worst month of the year (I hate you, February) and my house is, for one shining instant, clean.